This is the result of my first physical since the year started with "19."
- Quinaretic - For blood pressure that, I'm pretty sure, made the nurse audibly gulp upon seeing the numbers.
- Diovan HCT - Another blood pressure medication, because apparently only one wouldn't do the job.
- Sulfamethoxazole - For treating bacterial infections. Oh right, remember my banged-up leg? Infected as hell, despite pouring hydrogen peroxide on it twice a day as instructed. Glad to see all that assorted burning and stinging served no purpose.
- Rifampin - Another bacteria stopper. Although Drugs.com describes it as for "the treatment of all forms of tuberculosis and the treatment of some people who have meningitis without symptoms." And that's awesome.
- Tricor - My favorite. For, as the doctor put it, a "savagely genetic cholesterol problem." Savagely genetic. I like that only because I can blame my parents instead of my well-balanced diet of fast food, caffeine and beer. I'll be taking this every day for the rest of my life, I'm told.
- Hydrocodone - Well, this one I like. Fluffy rainbows!
That said, the first one of you who raises an eyebrow and says "Should you really be eating that?" will get a fist in the neck.
Oh, and does anybody have one of those little S-M-T-W-T-F-S boxy things? I'm in the market.