Sunday, March 29, 2009

Friday, March 27, 2009

"I said, put it in my bas-KET!"

High schoolers Derrick Favors and Anne Marie Armstrong were chosen Mr. and Miss Georgia Basketball by The Atlanta Journal-Constitution.

Apparently they wasted no time in consummating the union.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Baby steps

From today's Washington Post:
The Obama administration is considering asking Congress to give the Treasury secretary unprecedented powers to initiate the seizure of non-bank financial companies, such as large insurers, investment firms and hedge funds, whose collapse would damage the broader economy, according to an administration document.

socialism [soh-shuh-liz-uhm] – noun
1. a theory or system of social organization that advocates the vesting of the ownership and control of the means of production and distribution, of capital, land, etc., in the community as a whole.

Gosh, why do conservatives keep using the S-word? That's just crazy talk.

(Please note this refers to any company whose collapse would theoretically damage the economy, not a company that is actually collapsing).

Monday, March 23, 2009

Memories of The Blue Oyster Bar...

A quarter century ago, a wave of reckoning flowed through this great land, ushering in an era of unabashed - nah, just kidding. Twenty-five years ago today, Police Academy was released.

And in the tradition of my Die Hard running diary, let's take a look at the 1984 classic that propelled Steve Guttenberg, Bubba Smith and Marion Ramsey to super-stardom.

0:01: Oh, sweet memories. The tree-shaped Ladd Company logo that began each glorious installment of the franchise, followed by the familiar Robert Folk score - which somehow went unrewarded at Oscar time.

0:02: The late David Graf makes ...

Ok, I'm not really going to do this. But this first movie - and the third one, to a slightly lesser extent - are actually damn funny. Bring on part 8.

(Really, you don't know how close I came to writing 5,000 words on this series. Maybe for next year's 25th anniversary of part 2).

Sunday, March 22, 2009

Lib'rul media


Sure, President Obama did go 8-for-8 in Saturday predictions - which isn't much to speak of, as I did as well. Funny, though, the "can pick 'em" headline makes no mention of his 13 wrong first round calls.

My favorite part, though, is the lauding "better than 40 percent." In government, I guess, being worse than only 60% is something to brag about.

Friday, March 20, 2009


You know Ronnie would be involved if he were still around.

My God, over a year away.

Lionsgate has just declared April 23, 2010 as the day we get facials of wet awesome. The day our guts explode with camouflage confetti. The day Fate looks us in the eye and calls us a pussy, and we just nod.

The day Sylvester Stallone's The Expendables hits theaters.

Of course I need not refresh your memory because, like me, you've all fashioned countless notebooks of sketches and descriptions of what you think eventual scenes could be like. But just for fun: Stallone, writing, directing and starring. Mickey Rourke. Dolph Lundgren. Jet Li. Jason Statham. Danny Trejo. Eric Roberts. Arnold freakin' Schwarzenegger. Forest Whitaker. Um, 50 Cent. (Yeah, Whitaker had to drop out, and was replaced by 50 Cent. So there's that.)

Honestly, I'm a little nervous about going into cardiac arrest over the trailer. I have no idea how I'm going to survive to see the closing credits.

Oh, and Iron Man 2 is scheduled to open just 14 days later. I'm assuming they'll now move the Robert Downey, Jr. flick because, obviously, everybody will be seeing The Expendables again that weekend.

(By the way, I haven't even mentioned that Stallone has confirmed Rambo V, and Rourke is apparently in talks to play the villain. I can't handle that right now).

Sunday edit: Apparently 50 Cent is out. Darn. Instead, the role of "Hale Caesar" (awesome) will be played by the all-around kick-ass Terry Crews. You may not know his name, but you - well, you may not know his face either. But he has already cemented his place in film history by playing President Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho in Idiocracy.

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Dharma chameleon

Only a few months after a Shield character used a UGA game as a false alibi, my beloved alma mater made an appearance on another popular show last night.

Click to embiggenify.

That's Lost's Hurley (Jorge Garcia), attempting to blend into 1977 Dharma culture by wearing a University of Georgia sweatshirt. I assume that logo was around in the mid-'70s?

(Of course, the outerwear was provided by Sawyer, played by former UGA student Josh Holloway. Nice to see The Second Coolest Josh Ever To Attend UGA represent where he came from.)

By the way, as an added bit of trivia: did you know the University of Georgia won seven national football championships before 1950? Yep, in 1904, '08, '15, '16, '23 and '42.

Monday, March 16, 2009

Weird, early prediction of minimal interest to anybody reading this

Matthew Stafford will be the Denver Broncos' starting quarterback this year.

Detroit could deal its #1 pick (and perhaps a third rounder) to the Broncos for Jay Cutler and Denver's first rounder (#13 overall). Detroit gets its QB, Denver gets Cutler's replacement.

It all came to me in a Sweetwater-induced fever dream this weekend. It's probably wrong. And you probably don't care.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Pugnacious D

Wink if you love pugs!

Or, uh, smile if your eye was temporarily sewn shut because of an ocular ulcer!

No, I like the first one better.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Reason #812 I'm going to Hell

This headline made me laugh.

I mean, I know - awful, horrible, sick, appalling. Also a DVD I'd pay a hundred bucks for.

Tuesday, March 03, 2009

Wonder boy

What you're about to see was the bane of my 1986 existence.

Despite appearing in two classic movies, I've never been asked for my autograph. However, in the mid-'80s, I was asked for another person's autograph. Twice.

Once at a local mall and once at a Falcons game, I was approached by kids who thought I was the star of a sitcom. A sitcom so wretched, even my 10-year-old self hated it - and my 10-year-old self liked damn near anything.

Honestly, the resemblance really was startling. Damn it.

More evidence of the absurdity:

If the glove does not fit

"We're killing our planet with greenhouse gases! The temperature is rising and is going to melt the icecaps, kill the polar bears, and flood our cities! Well, yeah, except for the years from 2001 until now. But that's just, like, you know, a hiccup. But it's so totally real, still! You need to keep pouring money into my studies! Because, like, yeah, the temperature hasn't been rising in almost a decade, but it's gonna come back with a vengeance! Like in 30 years. Yeah, right about the time I retire, what about it?"

People are still falling for this shit?