Thursday, July 30, 2009

Happy hour

At tonight's highly retarded "teachable moment," three guys will have a beer at the White House.

President Barack Obama will host Boston cop Jim Crowley and Harvard professor Henry Louis Gates, Jr. over some dumb shit that happened earlier this month. Spoiler alert: nobody's mind will be changed. If you were with Crowley before, you'll be with him after. Gates, likewise. Obama - well, I'm not sure anybody thought he handled this one well.

Ah, but there's a rub. A new detail has emerged, one bound to pull folks firmly into one of the camps: the White House has released each participant's beer of choice.

President Obama will drink Bud Light. Safe, bland, American.

Crowley will drink Blue Moon. Flavorful, a little girly, also American.

Gates will drink Red Stripe. Un-American, obviously communist.

I would have gone with a Sweetwater 420 myself, but if given the choice, I'm drinking with Crowley. Blue Moon is damn good. (I just hope he doesn't put a piece of fruit it in. Good god man, you're a cop.)

What would y'all choose? And is anybody disappointed with Obama's selection? I mean, as much as I don't like his politics, the guy is a suave MFer and should drink as such. And there are probably some pissed off Chicago breweries right now.


Pete Coors said...

Officer, I 2nd the Sweetwater 420 nomination.

Bobby said...

I would have chosen a more 'manly' dark stout such as Guinness or the like, but that probably would have been construed as racist because of the tint of the brew. Anyway, if I'm Crowley, I don't even go. Doing so suggests that I think I did something wrong. I didn't. Unless he's just going because the President of the United States told him to and he'll get to see/do some neat stuff as a result... Personally I'd have stayed away from the whole thing and let the facts speak for themselves.

DAve said...

Guinness, because 1) it's truly the nectar of the gods, and 2)if we are going down a road of socialized medicine, I could at least push to get it covered under the new healthcare plan.

the fiancee said...


I *heart* Mexico.

Josh M. said...

That's my girl.

Josh M. said...

Oh, and apparently Crowley did put a lemon wedge in his Blue Moon. I might have to side with Obama after all.

Dennis said...

Doug said...

I would've chosen a Baltika 6 and paired it with a beef-and-sour-cream borscht, just to truly cement my socialist credentials.